Discipline

I listen to a lot of sports talk radio.  At least, I think I listen to a lot of it for someone who tries really hard to avoid all athletic endeavors.  I enjoy hearing the analysis, the predictions, the opinions.  This week I have heard variations on the theme of child discipline as it relates to the Adrian Peterson situation.

Let's be clear.  The situation is child abuse.  Whether or not he was trying to discipline, when he drew blood not once, but fifteen some odd times from his son's legs, he was being abusive.  He says he was parenting the way he was raised, and he turned out great, so it must be the right way to go.

I wasn't there, so I don't know if he inflicted this punishment out of anger or frustration.  But, we all reach the end of our patience with our kids, sometimes even before breakfast!  We're all trying to figure out what works the best.  And just when you figure it out for one kid, your next kid has a totally different personality, or your kid gets older and what worked for awhile no longer has the desired effect.

I am the first to admit that my kids rarely do what I want them to do, and it is not unusual for the dinner hour to culminate in a symphony of screams and tears.  But there are options that we should all keep in our arsenal so that we don't lash out with a violent reaction.  Off the top of my head, here are a few suggestions.  Granted, as I type this all of the noisemakers are asleep so it is much easier to do now than in the heat of the  moment when brother 1 is calling brother 2 an idiot and sister 1 is dropping brother 3 and sister 2 is pooping on the living room floor, but let's try.

1.  If siblings are fighting over a toy, put THE TOY in time out.  The top of our refrigerator is the home of many troublesome toys.

2.  For the screaming child: You can scream as much as you want, but you will do it outside.  There's the door.

3.  Instead of yelling commands at your kids, use "when you do this, then this will happen."  For example, when you pick up your toys, you can have ice cream for dessert.  Or, when you finish your homework, I will play checkers with you.

4.  There is a time for whining.  Tell the child that if he wants to whine about something, he can make an appointment at 2:30 am.

Most of these we learned from Love and Logic.  I strongly suggest you pick up one of the books at the library or Google it if you are not familiar with it.

By the way, in my experience absolutely nothing works to make my kids behave in church.  The one place I want them to sit still and try to be holy, they act the worst.  So if any of you have that one figured out, I am all ears.