The phone is ringing

I waited six days for my firefighter/paramedic husband to return from the aftermath of the 9/11 attack on the Pentagon.  He will tell you that his efforts, and those of his first responder comrades, were not extraordinary or brave or heroic.  They did the job that they trained every day to carry out.  They answered the call.  The next day they answered another call.  It might not have been of the same magnitude to the nation, but to the family in crisis it was.

The Angels invited him to a commemoration during their baseball game against the Yankees on the tenth anniversary of 9/11.  There he met Derek Jeter.  Many will remember Jeter after his retirement this year not for any particular statistic that he accumulated, but for his reliability day in and day out.  He has had an unwavering dedication to his team and the game.  He answered the call.  He never stopped practicing, learning, growing.

Motherhood is our call.  With any luck our on-the-job training will not involve racing into burning buildings, but it will mean getting dirty and running around in circles from time to time.  We are called to be the voice of calm, the dependable one, the one who can save the day (or the science fair project).  One day the emergency might be a crooked ponytail or a sandwich not sliced into perfect triangles.  The next it might be a terrible diagnosis, a lost job, an accident.  Mothers answer the call each time because it is the job we not only have to do, but love to do. 

Our children can’t tell the difference between when we know exactly what to do and when we are making it up as we go along.  As long as we start each day anew with the love and dependability that our children crave, we are succeeding.  You are already your child’s hero, even as you worry each night about the day’s shortcomings.  Over time, the questions and insecurities fade, and a confidence to take on each challenge emerges.  So answer the call.  You are ready.

Vacation

I have mentioned before that people will occasionally call maternity leave "vacation" and that I usually respond with something about how it is not much of a vacation to spend three months in a constant state of semi-awakeness while learning how to do everything one-handed.  Nobody believes me except other parents of multitudes, but this new baby in the house thing really does get easier each time.  I don't remember a single productive thing I did while on maternity leave with Dodge.  It was too much of an ordeal to even go to the grocery store.  By now, I navigate the aisles with 5 kids without much of a hiccup, although we do call it a "girls day out" when just Corda, Mac, and I go shopping (with the baby along for the ride of course).  

On the whole, since I am not working (outside the home) at the moment, I am far busier, or at least more active, than normal.  Instead of sitting at a desk for 8 hours, I have time to do all the other stuff that doesn't get done when I am at work all day, but that work also multiplies.  Instead of cooking and and cleaning up just dinner, all the meals and several snacks fill the days.  Toys that were put away once magically reappear several more times.  Nevertheless, I have been cleaning out closets, studying, failing miserably to install a garbage disposal, and trying my hand at applying for grants for Never Forget Foundation.  I may need to go back to work for a break.

Opportunities to support Never Forget Foundation

Many of you have seen me post about our non-profit Never Forget Foundation, in particular when Christopher visits high schools around the country talking about 9/11 and the skills that students need to develop now to be successful in school and their future careers in public safety, healthcare, or otherwise.  Now that we have official 501(c)(3) status, there are many easy opportunities to help our efforts.  In the coming weeks you will be able to register your Albertsons, Tom Thumb, and Kroger cards to support Never Forget.  In case you don't know how this works, you will simply designate Never Forget as your charity, and then the stores will donate a small percentage of what you spend.  After a minimal effort to register your cards, you can just do your normal shopping and forget about it, but we will never forget your support.  I'll have all the signup details ready soon, so stay tuned.

Observations from the past week

1.  Hank continues to be the source of a number of gems, such as "I slept so good I thought I skipped a day."

2.  When travelling, it might be less of a hassle to pack nothing and just buy what you need when you get there, since a certain mega airline never bothers to deliver the luggage with the passengers.

3.  Does Chris Colfer have a twin?  And if so, is he a Catholic seminarian in Texas?  I was seated at a table with this guy and kept wanting to refer to him as Kurt.

4.  My efforts to get Mackenzie to "use her words" instead of screaming are being undermined by allowing her to watch the birth scenes in the BBC series Call the Midwife with me.

Limbo: How low can you go?

“You know, the key with us is we set the bar low.  That way we got a pretty good chance of winding up happy.”

That quote was at the tail end of a video snippet of my favorite author, Michael Perry, explaining his family’s approach to farming, available here: http://video.wpt.org/video/2365286449/

It pretty much runs counter to what we’ve always said, right?  Aim high, set stretch goals, exceed expectations, do your best!!!

He said that with farming, given his travel schedule and unpredictable Wisconsin weather, he’s happy if they can just grow a little corn to feed to the chickens, so his family can have fresh eggs.  Maybe they can raise a few pigs, and take care of the land they own.  He’s not trying to make a living as a farmer, or grow state fair prize winning vegetables.  Low bar = happy with the results.

I think we need to keep most of our bars high – succeed in school, figure out a career path, manage your money, treat others kindly.  Don’t forget about the low bars, though.  The daily successes will give you the motivation to attack the bigger goals. 

What low bar triumphs have you had lately?  Today, I scrubbed a bathroom, made phone calls and typed this while two babies took naps, and enjoyed a healthy lunch with Mackenzie.  All in all, a good morning.

Week 2

Mom.  Mom!  MOM!  Yes, Dodge?  Did you know that the baby is asleep on the bathroom floor wrapped in a towel?  Of course, that's where I left him, and wherever he wants to sleep is fine with me!  Dodge's concern was particularly amusing because at least once a week he wakes up at o-dark-thirty, takes a shower, and then goes back to sleep on the bathroom floor wrapped in a towel.

When he's not dozing on the floor, Wyatt is usually found in his sling, which always raises a lot of questions when we go out.  Everything from "where can I buy one of those" to "can he breathe in there?"  Or, oddly today when he was dressed in a blue and gray onesie, three strangers asked how old "she" is.

The sling keeps my hands free for cooking, and here's a new recipe that I tried today for lunch.  Half of the family appreciated it! 

Mushrooms and Spinach with Couscous

6 ounces mushrooms, sliced and sauteed in olive oil with garlic
Add 6 ounces of spinach, a cup of uncooked couscous, half a cup of water, and a bit of basil.  Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and cook for 5 minutes.  Remove from heat and stir in 4 ounces of cream cheese.  That's it!

Week 1

Pardon my absence last Wednesday as I was preoccupied with Wyatt's arrival early that morning.  The Friday before that I attended a lunch during which one person recounted a story of working with a pregnant colleague, and during the time they worked together, he would periodically get distracted and comment to her "You're growing a human right now!  Wow!"  Indeed, wow.  

During the time that I was growing a human, I worried about a number of things - people's reaction to a mom of five who also works outside the home full time being near the top of the list - but I worried most about how Mackenzie would react to being replaced as the baby of the family so soon.  So far, so good.  In fact, she has taken on the role of big girl by giving up her pacifier, adding a couple of words to her vocabulary, and drinking from a regular cup all in the past seven days.  She is still taking a long afternoon nap, giving me time to study for my enrolled agent exams.

The rest of us are working on how to function efficiently as a unit.  For example, we have to load the car in a different order now, and so that means people have to be ready to go when it is their turn.  We have to work more on our menu planning to identify healthy choices that everyone will eat so that we don't waste food or time preparing multiple meals.  I'm all ears on suggestions for getting everyone to pitch in with the laundry.  We get it washed and dried, but rarely put away.

More words to come next week...